I count myself lucky to have grown up amongst men who care enough to instill teachings and lessons in the youth around them. Fatherhood is no walk in the park, yet my father, uncles and older friend's grip it with both hands, doing their best to raise individuals who will fare well the further they grow from the nest. Having observed their efforts and the results they have brought about over the past years, here are some key takeaways many men of my generation need to pick up on:

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1. If you are going to do something, give it your all.

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Whether you’re thinking of going on a run or starting a business, take it seriously and see it through to the end. Here’s the thing with beginning a journey on a path you’ve never been on before - it looks scary as hell. You may only have a vague idea of where you are going and how long it will take to get there. You might get halfway and realise it is way tougher than you anticipated. You might want to quit. You might start half-assing it and dragging your feet. And at that point begins your slow demise. 

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There were days when I came home with a bad grade or lost dismally at a tennis tournament, but the fact that I tried my best is all that my dad cared about. I was often perplexed at the sight of him smiling at the sound of a result I wish I could undo, but only years later do I finally understand the value in the sentiment. 

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Now, each time I pick up a pencil, prepare for a meeting or begin a new project, I pour everything into it because it betters my chances at hitting my target. Key word here is ‘better’ because even at 100% you can still miss, but if you go at it at 70% or 30%, the odds are even less in your favour. Give it your all, and sleep better at night knowing whatever happens next depends on how much the world values your efforts. 

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2. Don’t take life too seriously 

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There’s an uncle of mine who’s been a jovial chap for as long as I can remember. Though highly protective and attentive of himself, his family and their needs, he still carries an air of calmness wherever he goes. 

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Once I asked him how he manages to keep his cool the way that he does, he responded saying, “Life is long. The more you worry about it, the less of it you have. Don’t lose your head worrying too much about inconsequential things. Always focus on the positive and enjoy the present whilst you have it.”

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I had many ‘buts’ to throw in whilst he went on, but eventually it clicked for me too. Even though I don’t always follow his advice, what he had to say is true. Life is all about the here and now. As young as we are, we get caught up chasing and worrying about things that are inconsequential. Things that won’t matter to us not too long from now. We stress unnecessarily and think too deeply, when we should instead live in the moment, enjoying more of our time on this earth with the people we love whilst we still can.

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3. Life is a marathon, not a sprint.

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“Imagine how you were at 5. Now think of who you were at 14. And now examine yourself in this present moment. You think all this happened overnight? No. so why do you think any different of the projects you are working on now?” Said a very good friend of mine who has been drilling the sentiment into my head for as long as I can remember.

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Many of us have so many years to pursue our dreams and ambitions. Even if you may not be in the position to do so today, you still have many months and years to get to them. Maybe you work a highly demanding job or you are raising kids whilst juggling school. That is completely okay. You are probably trying your best and that is all that we can ask of you. 

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Eventually a time will come when you are able to chase that dream you’ve had for the longest time. Eventually your business will start making those profits you’ve been dreaming of. Eventually your family will reconcile and all will be well. Take life one day at a time, working towards everyday being better than the last, and see what that could do for you in 10, 20, 30 years from now. 

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There is a lot of wisdom lying in wait for us out there. We just have to ask. Many men are wishing the best for us, and if we care at all to get some advice on how to ‘life’ better, it’s worth asking any of them around you how they have managed to do so well thus far. Your inquisitions are likely to be met with loads of enthusiasm by men with years of wisdom they have been dying to pass on.

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